Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places
While I was checking my hotmail today, I noticed a link off to the side that read: 5 Fun ways to Find Love. Being that I like fun and have a lack of love in my life, I decided that I ought to click the link and see what it's all about. The article describes "offbeat ways that single people are mixing and mingling these days across the country."
Way #1 - At a spelling bee. This is what caught my eye and made me want to read the article. Apparently one of the cool things that those hip New York City cats are doing these days is holding spelling bee mixers. Hey, B-A-B-Y, I really D-I-G you. How's about we go back to my P-L-A-C-E? This immediately moved onto my list of Things I Need to Do Before I Die. I was Mrs. White's 5th grade class champion at Beverly Gardens Elementary School back in '89. Oh yeah. Bring it on! The best part was some of the words that they had to spell: chupacabra and chlamydia.
Way #2 - While grocery shopping. Hey, baby, those are some nice, firm melons you got there. This one seemed pretty common, except that there was a store that actually sponsored a singles night. You could shop for meat and meat.
Way #3 - While riding the rails. When I think of the people you can meet that come off the trains here, I don't think dates. Now you might appreciate the charms of a smelly vagrant, but that's not really for me. But for those of you whole live near big cities with commuter trains, now you can take the singles train on your morning commute. Hey, baby, going my way?
Way #4 - At a new kind of party. This describes parties where you bring a friend that you don't want to hook up with and introduce them to other people's friends that they don't want to hook up with. When I think of girls I don't date because I just want to be friends with them, I think the really ugly girl who you let hang out with you because she is friends with all the hot girls and likes to drink and watch football with you. (It's possible she also plays rugby and eats raw meat.)
Way #5 - While cooking. Hey, baby, you really bake my bread. There are companies that sponsor cooking get togethers where you can really "cook" with your date. I like food. I like women. Good times.
All in all, some interesting ways to meet someone.
Way #1 - At a spelling bee. This is what caught my eye and made me want to read the article. Apparently one of the cool things that those hip New York City cats are doing these days is holding spelling bee mixers. Hey, B-A-B-Y, I really D-I-G you. How's about we go back to my P-L-A-C-E? This immediately moved onto my list of Things I Need to Do Before I Die. I was Mrs. White's 5th grade class champion at Beverly Gardens Elementary School back in '89. Oh yeah. Bring it on! The best part was some of the words that they had to spell: chupacabra and chlamydia.
Way #2 - While grocery shopping. Hey, baby, those are some nice, firm melons you got there. This one seemed pretty common, except that there was a store that actually sponsored a singles night. You could shop for meat and meat.
Way #3 - While riding the rails. When I think of the people you can meet that come off the trains here, I don't think dates. Now you might appreciate the charms of a smelly vagrant, but that's not really for me. But for those of you whole live near big cities with commuter trains, now you can take the singles train on your morning commute. Hey, baby, going my way?
Way #4 - At a new kind of party. This describes parties where you bring a friend that you don't want to hook up with and introduce them to other people's friends that they don't want to hook up with. When I think of girls I don't date because I just want to be friends with them, I think the really ugly girl who you let hang out with you because she is friends with all the hot girls and likes to drink and watch football with you. (It's possible she also plays rugby and eats raw meat.)
Way #5 - While cooking. Hey, baby, you really bake my bread. There are companies that sponsor cooking get togethers where you can really "cook" with your date. I like food. I like women. Good times.
All in all, some interesting ways to meet someone.
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you're not going to meet the love of your life at a bar. that only happens in movies. You could always stand on the corner with a sign.
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